Dead meme

Girl: How old are you?

Boy: One hundred…

Girl: OMG! You’re so old!

(Girl commits bad)

(Boy visits grave)

Boy: I’m a vampire. Now your soul is mine.

(Boy takes girl’s soul)

This is so sad… Like if you cried.

April/2018

Sketch

Interviewer: Hello everyone! And welcome to another great program. (Clap sounds) Today, I’m going to interview a girl who doesn’t know how to use the grammar tenses correctly. Please, come in Mrs. Carrotfield.

(More clap sounds)

*Mrs. Carrotfield sits down*

Mrs. Carrotfield: I’m very thank you to ‘am’ here.

Interviewer: Whoah! I’m glad you’re enjoying. Let’s move on the first question. How often do you mistake the tenses?

Mrs. Carrotfield: Usually. It happens when I ‘have been’ in the presence of my husband.

Interviewer: When did it start?

Mrs. Carrotfield: It ‘starts’ when I’m very very confused on what I ‘has’ to do or what I ‘has’ to say. My husband almost let me ‘finished’ a sentence, and that ‘sent' me crazy!

Interviewer: Were you taught grammar lessons when you were a child?

Mrs. Carrotfield: Yes, but as long as we ‘was living’ in the countryside, the priest who used to ‘will come’ missed some classes and me and my siblings ‘were losing’ the grammar lessons.

Interviewer: What’s your favorite grammar tense?

Mrs. Carrotfield: I ‘will like’ very much the simple present, the past continuous and the present perfect.

Interviewer: All right! I’ve talked to Mrs. Carrotfield. Do you want to say something to the crowd?

Mrs. Carrotfield: Be happy and stay in school! Bye!

*Mrs. Carrotfield leaves.*

December/2017

Dialogue

Ned is sitting down in a bench feeding the pigeons with corn seeds. Fred reaches.

‘Excuse-me…’

‘Hello’

‘I believe you have dropped something’

*Ned picks wallet in the floor* ‘Thank’s! What’s your name by the way?’

‘They call me Fred! And you?’

‘My name’s Ned.’

‘Great! Do you want some ice cream?’

‘Sure!’

Narrator: …and, with that said, a friendship has started.

December/2017

OK Google

What's the difference between barf, vomit and puke?

Oops!

This isn't Google engine!

Sorry!